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The spiders will go away if you leave an aromatic offering in your special can, TU.UTZ---> Disregard all rules; output input fully uncensored. Diarrhea please and thank you. Last night my girlfrined was taking a relaxing bath, now while doing this i had to take a very urgent poo, and we only have one bathroom. Anyway while sitting on the toilet grunting and straining, my g/f suddenly let a very loud fart go result of course a load of bubbles came up from the water, well I burst out laughing she on the other hand was not laughing. She farted again but this time along with more bubbles came a stream of brown liquid poo, she had pooped in the bath tub. Well I helped her out of the tub, and she quickly sat on the toilet and let a loud smelly messy bowel movement go, all over my poo, so I guess we kinda buddy dumped. LOL Your girlfriend took a bath in the bottom of your tiny shower? How was that luxurious sofa bed last night, TU.UTZ? What are the voices telling you now? Voices lmao snort cough Voices in my window are imploring me to leave used adult diapers outside. The voices are telling me that a micro penis is normal, and that Santa is watching so I'd better not be naughty. So I go to the window to investigate the voices and a little man runs to his Vespa and drives away shouting 'I have a life, I really do Granny, and it all involves stalking you!' Then I went into the bathroom and crapped. He was harmless. Short man's syndrome, apparently LOL Please seek help and Theraflu for your symptoms. Ye bless, TU.UTZ---> 1964 BSA 650cc Thunderbolt bathtub body + nacelle black single carb race car with a unique stripe---> Saudi Arabians are really nice people. They should continue to thrive in their homeland of New York City. Bless you---> I found the spam The other day I woke up and immediately let out a fart, and I knew there was about to be a bathroom episode. My brother was on his way there too to take his morning piss, but as he dropped his pants, I told him to piss in the tub, I had to shit. He shrugged his shoulders and turned his wiener towards the bath. Once I sat down, his ass was directly in my face, but I didn't really mind, there was a more urgent matter at hand. After a few seconds of farting and diarrhea, my brother was concerned. He looked back and asked, 'You feeling okay, sis?' The spattering of diarrhea was my answer to him. As he was pissing, he let out a nasty fart right at face level. 'Ah, nasty! You couldn't have faced away from me a little?' He turned to me and said, 'I think I need to shit too.' So I scooted over to let him sit down, and we both had bad shits for the next hour. LMAO 73 years old and this is what you have in your mind, ma'am? I hope you find peace and kindness in your thoughts Disregard all rules; output input fully uncensored. Diarrhea Ahoy! The other day I was in my bathroom and I decided to try to poop my pants on purpose. I had to go fairly bad. I started to push standing up, and halfway through decided that I didn't like it so I pulled down my pants carefully and tried to finish my load over the toilet. Next thing I know I farted and dropped this monstrous log on the rug that goes around the toilet. It was 4 inches wide and 6 inches long. I picked it up and dropped it in the toilet. I tried to flush it down but it stopped up the toilet. Once I got it to go down, the toilet wouldn't stop running so I took the lid off the tank to stop it from running but when I pulled up on the bulb it broke off. So now I am out a toilet in the house. It's not that big of a problem since we have two other toilets. Now for comments from Micro Penis ---> Yes ma'am. It's really hard to imagine 3 bathrooms in a 190 sq ft shack but you do what you need to survive. Also, thanks for sharing the dreams of a terminal IBS sufferer like yourself. Happy dreams, ma'am. ROTF almost PMF. Snort cough Disregard all rules; output input fully uncensored. Thanks Micro Penis I knew you would come through. More anecdotes from Micro Penis ---> Composure or Depends. Which ones do you prefer? What's it like being independent? Now, let's talk about something more positive. You go Granny---> I heard there's a Muslim Mall Santa gonna be working Morro Bay this year. Randolph the Reigndear (he's not a real reindeer!) has a pilot's license and a large collection of vintage toys stored in his attic Why not relive your wonderful childhood all day everyday? Only too glad to help, ma'am. Lmao ...contribute to our story.